tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-83726682024-02-22T11:38:19.673-08:00Rev. Crystal's Full Moon BlessingsA place for me to share some of my hopes, dreams, inspirations, ideas,passion and witchy spirit with people.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger158125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-23404012768871566032012-05-21T15:50:00.005-07:002012-05-21T15:50:49.933-07:00Craziness as a processThe year has been interesting and chaotic at times but not all chaos is a bad thing. I have done a lot and am enjoying a lot while other things continue to be a struggle in daily life. Sometimes I wonder if it is the multiple roles I play or the recovery from the trauma associated with the loss of my mom that has me in a perpetual state of exhaustion. I think it is a combination of all of those things, even though many of the tasks are fulfilling and make me happy. <br />
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Raising a family of 6 is challenging in and of itself. When I add onto that school, a full time job, writing my books, workshops, writing for Daughters of Eve and PNC, life becomes a mixture of textures that are booth beautiful and tiring. I feel so blessed to be able to fill my life with all of these things and I also know I need to take a blessed nap sometimes. Naps are good ya know...<br />
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In an attempt to update my blog I will say that I was accepted for my masters program at Cal State East Bay in Social Work, I start in the fall. I have the third book in editing with the publisher and waiting for the first rewrite. Robert was in his first play and was magnificent. He did so well and has so much stage presence that I felt so proud of him. <br /><br />
I had a fabulous PantheaCon and presented three workshops. It was great to be a part of so many fabulous things happening all at once and to enjoy the company of those I don't get to see that often. I am now coming to the end of my term as the co-first officer of the Northern Local Council of CoG (not sure if I will run for the next but might) and I have been asked and accepted a board position with Solar Cross. I am excited to be working closely with Thorn on some really important projects. <br />
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I was asked and accepted to be a Featured Speaker at Pagan Spirit Gathering and will be going to Illinois in June for that festival. Looking forward to seeing all of my Minnesota folks again and meeting new people. I also spoke at the 11th Annual pagan Festival this past weekend and was honored to be asked to speak for a slot. That was a fun experience. <br />
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All in all things are transforming, shifting and recovering from the last two and a half years... it is in progress. I am still working hard and writing harder. <br />
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Blessed Be<br />
CrystalUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-13074028909149651362011-10-27T23:15:00.001-07:002011-10-27T23:15:38.286-07:00No Shoes, No Rights<div style="text-align: center;"><img src="http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQv-VeTD4O8e70dNRZdBmmJ2Jrikh_Esup6a4LX2bHh9OdR_xwowQ"></div>I try to focus on the great things, that makes me powerful in my job. I see kids that range from having very little to almost nothing. It is hard work, it is rewarding work but more than any of those, it is necessary work. I have met some of the most incredible people with the most incredible children that have survived things I only see in my nightmares. And yet they live....<div> <br></div><div>Today was one of those days for me when I concentrate on the good in a sea of harshness. Two things happened that I want to reflect on. I went to the homecoming game for the middle school that I work for. It was incredible. The boys were on the court like professionals, in uniform and working as a team! From the outside you would not know that they were struggling, inner city kids that live in the hardest conditions in one of the hardest cities in the US. The team beat the other team 36 to 22. It was beautiful to watch and I was so proud to be a part of supporting hope to these kids. </div> <div><br></div><div>In the rush and excitement of the game, I went to say hello to the kids on the team. It took me a couple of minutes after the kids came out of the huddle to realize what they were doing. The boys (excited and smiling) were taking off their shoes to return to others because they don't have their own basketball shoes. They were borrowing shoes to wear with their uniforms. It hurt my heart. </div> <div><br></div><div>Such talent, such heart, such resilience.... such poverty, such disparity, such sadness. </div><div><br></div><div>After the game I was talking to one of my student. He was basically one of the MVP's of this game and was beaming. He wanted me to meet his mom and she was very pleasant. We all went outside and I heard my name in the distance, "Ms. Crystal!!" I turned around to see one of my old students from 3 years ago. She is now in the 11th grade. I hugged her, asked how she was and I truely felt joy in my heart!!</div> <div><br></div><div>She tells me about her life and school and says, "that's my brother over there!". I looked over to see her speaking of my student that I was just referring to, the MVP. Right after she said that, the mother said, "yeah, that is my other kid". I was floored as this sunk in. I have been a counselor to both of these kids, siblings, in the last 3 years and never made the connection. How crazy is it to work in a community where I continue to treat siblings and the pain is so deep, so entrenched. </div> <div><br></div><div>I hope to be around to support generations of kids coming through the doors of this community. I love that I have been a consistent face that they can come and see and I am still there. I am humbled that I have the chance to be that very person that has the trust of so many kids who struggle with trusting others. I am humbled.....</div> <div><br></div><div>And while I was heart broken to see this student take off the shoes he had on after his winning game, his sister (my old student) was a reminder that there is still hope despite disparity and adversity. One day, he might just have the rights to own his own pair of shoes.</div> <div><br></div><div><br><div><div><br></div> <br><br> </div></div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-15502105045495996112011-09-11T00:10:00.000-07:002011-09-11T00:10:05.890-07:00Embraced by Water, Released by Death<br />
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It has been a rough two years for me that have been overwhelmed with
various levels of grief and sadness. I do know that it is not just
been a hard time for me but for many people who are dealing with the
ups and downs of life these past two years, it has been very
challenging.
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My mother died in a tragic accident in January of 2010 and my aunt
just died a bit over a week ago from a long battle with cancer. I am
not sure what lessons I continue to learn from the last several years
but I know that I am learning and growing through this process; it is
a delicate balance though.
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After nights back and fourth to the hospital and late nights, I
decided to go to the gym and release some of the pent up stress from
the last several days. I had this moment in the locker room where I
made a last minute decision to go into the pool instead of run on the
treadmill. The pool is notoriously not my thing, so to speak, but
that night it felt important for me to just allow the water to
cleanse me.
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I stayed in the pool for about 40 minutes and then decided to go run.
While changing I checked my phone and noticed a missed call from my
other aunt and knew what news was awaiting me. Amazingly my aunt
passed while I was floating in the water, within that 30-40 minute
span. Was this a gift from Yemaya? I think so.</div>
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I felt prepared when I got the call, felt a bit as if I had been
washed of fear so that I could be ready for that very phone call and
that very moment. I felt warm still from the water, as if I was
receiving a hug that was embracing me through this. I knew it was
She.... I know her comfort and her ways.
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While I think about all of the horrors of losing yet another person
in my life, without the time to recover, I know that she is where she
needs to be and I am as well. I have continued to hear and feel
Yemaya coming back to my life as a strong presence, she knew I wasn't
ready yet and now I am.
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Brings me to wonder how the Gods decide what we are ready to handle
and how sometimes their presence seems so far away and others it
feels ever present. I have missed her from time to time and I am
glad that she and I are reconnecting, like a distance relative that
is familiar and comforting.
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And I know that she is working with my aunt on her transition and
that my mother is excited to have her friend with her. My aunt was
trying to tell me goodbye and I just couldn't hear it in that moment.
She told me that it would be ok, no matter what happens, that I
would be ok. I told her that I knew that to be true and she very
clearly looked me in the eyes and told me “I am excited to hang out
with CoCo”. It broke my heart but I knew it to be true. She and
my mom would be together again and I am grateful.
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May Yemaya continue to grace them both with comfort and
happiness....... and me as well.
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Blessed Be</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-10767092614151990522011-08-18T23:27:00.001-07:002011-08-18T23:27:40.140-07:00Writings from 8/6/11 in route to SHF<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Sitting in a terminal in LAX for the next two and a half hours and thinking about all the wonders of the process that I am in right now. As my plane touched down in LA and we were navigating the roadways to get to the gate, I looked out of my window at all of the wonders that sat before me. The mist created a shadow onto everything that was on the ground and made the planes we passed look like the biggest of birds that were sitting for a rest on the ground. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">The shapes of the planes, the mist, the flashing lights and sure size of the machinery that I was viewing and sitting on made me really think about the incredible wonder of our age and what we have come to take for granted here. I walk into a man made structure that is comprised of metal, wires, technology and steel wings, then I sit down and fly among the sky, above the clouds and into the lands that only the Gods naturally are able to soar. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">I am amazed at how this happens and then we walk among one another on the ground and treat each other with no foresight into what great things we accomplish together as people. If only the world could acknowledge one another for his or her gifts and the collective intellectual and spiritual gifts we bring to this universe, we could not dishonor one another the way that we do. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">All the thoughts of soaring above the worries of the mundane world became ever present in my mind when I looked down at the world beneath me and was reminded of how much bigger the world compared to the bills, common dissension, job woes, relationship mishaps and personal insecurities. While we become encapsulated into our own worlds of deficit thinking and pain, we are missing so much beauty in the world and the knowing that we are a part of something much bigger than ourselves. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">So, I await the next flight here at terminal 6 and wonder if I will be able to stay in the present moment enough to let my own problems become just situations that I will overcome because in the moment, there are no problems that need to be solved. This very moment is the only thing that is real. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">May everyone find their moment right now, acknowledge the sheer power and wonder of the human capacity to create and grow, and work your way towards being a part of collective healing and togetherness. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-78061396885757484092011-07-24T00:05:00.000-07:002011-07-24T00:05:17.741-07:00Embracing our importanceI have found that life continues to move forward whether we will it to or not. It is the human nature to think that removing one person from the equation would be a pause where life would stop for that moment. Reality is that it doesn't stop and we have to evaluate our importance in any given situation along the way. <br />
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When we have the opportunity to reassess our priorities and where we place them in our lives, it is a chance to choose those things that we previously might have missed or overlooked. It is essential that we always remember that every moment we are alive gives us the chance to evaluate and choose what path or road we are going to take. It doesn't matter how far down the road you have already gone, you can turn around or do a detour. <br />
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So in light of several experiences this week and the death of a pop star to the overdose of drugs.... it just reaffirms that we make our choices, we have a chance to change them along the way and we ultimately will be responsible for the outcomes if we choose to ignore the open doors that are presented to us. Whether those open doors are extra time to be with loved ones, a chance to be happier in life, some special time with your children, making time to meditate or ...... fighting for your sobriety...... in the end, life will go on without us and we have a choice to choose our fate all the time, every moment we are alive. <br />
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May we all choose wisely.<br />
Blessed BeUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-67323298716495739022011-06-25T20:15:00.001-07:002011-06-25T20:15:33.438-07:00An Unexpected Break with Co-Workers and Friends<div class="gmail_quote"><div class="gmail_quote">I wrote this on my retreat with coworkers a bit over a week ago, just now ready to share.<br> <br> <br> .........Often times life is about being able to capitalize on the many different opportunities that randomly present themselves and today I am going to do just that. After a really challenging school year full of tears, laughter, confusion and trauma, I am heading to a overnight retreat in Sonoma with the school site staff. There are many things I am not able to do because of finances, kid obligations or even time. When the opportunity cea for an overnight get away, I am learning to take it and make it valuable for me.<br> <br> The weather is nice and the sun is shining here in Sonoma. It feels like a whole different world that is not filled with chaos, busyness and expectations.<br> <br> What I like about some of the things that I am experiencing what many people don't understand and the many sacrifices that are made to support the lives of others is exhausting and yet rewarding at the same time. I have been honored to work with some of the most fabulous people in the world and I have appreciated every moment of it.</div> <div class="gmail_quote"><br></div><div class="gmail_quote"><br><br></div><br> </div><br><br><br><br> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-83266924890405019982011-06-05T23:47:00.001-07:002011-06-05T23:47:40.570-07:00Anthology, Contracts and BirthdaysIt has been an interesting last couple of weeks. While some things are getting easier and seem to be on track, others continue to be increasingly complicated. I have had the pleasure of turning in the manuscript for the Shades of Faith Anthology and have already gotten the copy editing sent back to me and returned. I am now waiting for the cover to be completed and whatever other ends need to be tied before I am looking at a release date. I am very excited about seeing it in print finally.... it has been a long time coming, with lots of work and coordination. <div> <br></div><div>Two major contractual things have happened in the last few weeks and I am signing away here. We went to court last week and we have finally signed the papers for guardianship for our grandson. We are now officially responsible to raise him until he is 18.... </div> <div><br></div><div>The second one was the contract from the Sacred Harvest Festival in Minnesota, the contract arrived and I have been reviewing it this weekend. I plan to sign it and send it in Monday or Tuesday. I am very nervous about it since it will be the first time I have flown to another state to give workshops and be considered the "honored guest". I am so excited about the opportunity and know that it will be a pivotal moment in realizing the gifts that the Goddess has ahead of me. I am trying to hold a space where I can move forward in accepting the grown I am going through and also trying not to get discouraged by the new family obligations I have now. </div> <div><br></div><div>I will also be doing a workshop in the Fresno Pagan Pride festival and will be preparing for that. As things get busy, I will be balancing a even more complicated walk but do so in service to the mother. </div> <div><br></div><div>And finally, I turned 35 on the 28th of May and it was a decent day. I felt good in my spirit and was feeling some optimism. I miss my mother greatly and thought of her during the week more than usual. I wonder what she would have done if she were here and how she would always look for the wordiest card and then only sign her name. I am coming to realize more and more that I will mourn her every day for the rest of my life... hopefully I will slowly fill the voids so that I may find other ways to feel whole again. </div> <div><br></div><div>many blessings of love and honor. ...<br><br> </div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-31937661410053112632011-05-14T22:21:00.000-07:002011-05-14T22:21:54.641-07:00Bee Happy<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi98U1tR8nSi9AeHdBUHPqPGYQApDrlR5AQ8pP5-Opp40iSijbsmEMkYL77w3-2GZrTXJYa9jIU7a9pB0tQjp2jGrL6i_614hgYd78PSdNA2faJ3fmMnQ0z2ooXNThw7wXnnwrpLw/s1600/bee+happy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi98U1tR8nSi9AeHdBUHPqPGYQApDrlR5AQ8pP5-Opp40iSijbsmEMkYL77w3-2GZrTXJYa9jIU7a9pB0tQjp2jGrL6i_614hgYd78PSdNA2faJ3fmMnQ0z2ooXNThw7wXnnwrpLw/s1600/bee+happy.jpg" /></a></div><br />
For those who don't know, I got into a car accident last year the day before my birthday, when a bee flew into my window and landed on my leg. And those who know me know that I don't do well around bugs. It is not my think at all. <br />
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So today was an interesting day that ultimately pushed me to look at the symbolism of bees and why I would see two in the same day and in weird circumstances. On my way to the bank there was a bee on my bumper. I (of course) being a little frightened, jumped in the car and took off. I figured it would fly away when the car moved and so I didn't worry about it anymore. <br />
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After coming home from the bank, I got out the car and walked towards the house only to find that the bee was in the same position.... on the bumper of the car. (YIKES!)<br />
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Fast forward to hours later, while at a family members house, and we were all hanging out at a going away party. We took the kids into the house to eat and about 10 minutes after being at the table, the same type of bee started flying around the dinning room light. Doubles YIKES<br />
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So on the way home I thought, "I have to think about what the bees were telling me". So, I am going to invest in being happy and acknowledge how all things are connected. I need to enjoy what I do, find happiness in all situations and let it into my life on a more consistent basis. Life is sweet, even when it stings and life will remain the substance and goodness of our reward for our hard work. <br />
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So I am going to concentrate on that this month. Not only is it the events of today but also a year ago this month that a bee tried to give me a lesson. I couldn't hear it last year, things were too fresh from my mom's death. This year I am ready to listen a little more. <br />
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And hopefully, since I got the message, the universe will not send me anymore right now..... (shivers)<br />
Blessed Be!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-46889330270148689102011-04-10T23:10:00.000-07:002011-04-10T23:10:38.907-07:00New relationships with money<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS6_fl9JrPmElIIESxvSwXaPnIvrRkPDYGTdFTaUS8GDvxvWk4YpPq_MobzgED_FvIm4AQ7NpWIyiEmMyFABuLskzkeMeozykVjOR9Fo-4mOKI1cjSJ3D7k-7tkB45YED8r5WBYw/s1600/wicca_by_caperuccita.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhS6_fl9JrPmElIIESxvSwXaPnIvrRkPDYGTdFTaUS8GDvxvWk4YpPq_MobzgED_FvIm4AQ7NpWIyiEmMyFABuLskzkeMeozykVjOR9Fo-4mOKI1cjSJ3D7k-7tkB45YED8r5WBYw/s320/wicca_by_caperuccita.jpg" width="236" /></a></div>I went to my session today with the hypnotherapist and we set our whole session to be on my relationship with money and feeling as if I would never have enough. Interestingly I had to look at some of the past images and beliefs that helped to shape my understanding of what is possible and what is not. I think there are a lot of cultural images and personal images that have helped to shape my relationships with money as well. <br />
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Interestingly I could not always come up with specific examples of discussing money in my childhood, or memories around childhood. I think a lot of that was because my mother did not talk about money and we just new that we didn't have any. She didn't have to say anything and the responsibility was on me as a child to prioritize the importance of the things I wanted. <br />
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So as an adult, I find I am discouraged around the incredible amounts of money that is required to raise a family. How do you have hope for the future stability of money when you have to spend upwards of 2,100 a month for childcare without support? This is what we have been paying since my mother died and it is hard. What we discussed is opening up the possibility of having money by changing my limited beliefs around my relationship with money and what I feel is possible. <br />
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So, the next steps for me will be around balance, dreams and believes. I am going to do some fundamental things around balance.... like sleep. I will start to work on getting more than 5 hours of sleep a night and structuring things better so that Sissy can sleep through the night. When I have more sleep, I am more optimistic and am not calling for things that will reinforce my limited beliefs around sacrifice. I will redefine what my dreams look like, especially when it comes to having money and doing things that require money. And third I will continue to work on my limited beliefs and try to see myself with what we need so that I can continue to provide for all the children. <br />
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More to come.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-77097311788663059332011-03-21T22:44:00.000-07:002011-03-21T22:44:38.599-07:00Exciting opportunity on Pagan's tonight show SaturdayAfter a wonderful Ostara ritual and time with the coven, I was sitting at home with the hubbie and trying to decide what to do. I posted such on facebook and the National First Officer of Covenant of the Goddess (and my friend) Peter Dybing posted commented and told me to listed to the Pagan's tonight show because they were doing a telethon for the Pagan Japan Relief. I tuned in to the show and listened while sitting on the couch and watching the kiddos. <br />
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While listening, I hear Peter mention my book and some of the community aspects of what I talk about. Funny enough, right before this I had asked the chat room how to call in. After Peter mentioned me and the book, the guests started telling me to call in. So I took my super nervous butt into the bedroom and called into the show. <br />
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I got the chance, for the first time, to talk on a live radio show about my book and have people want to hear what I was saying. Incredible feeling and very humbling at the same time. I realized in that moment that all the opportunities I have wanted to bring into fruition are coming to the surface and it is scary and exciting at the same time. I am honored to be able to create such supportive relationships with others who belief in my work and are being a voice for me in the community. It is all a bit overwhelming at times. <br />
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Tomorrow I am recording an interview with Modern Witch Podcast and next Wednesday I will be on the Sacred Feminine radio show on blog talk radio. This is truly incredible. <br />
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I will post as things are released. You can get the episode of Pagan's Tonight on itunes or at the website www.paganstonight.com. It is the episode with the Pagan Japan Relief/Doctor's without Borders episode. I am at the end of the second hour at the very beginning of the third hour. <br />
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I recognize the words of the Goddess as she lays the path before me and I am walking it. <br />
Blessed Be....Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-90900810907660500732011-03-19T23:55:00.000-07:002011-03-19T23:55:40.828-07:00Pagan Japan Relief<iframe width="425" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/E5vdIAlH4V0?fs=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-58279579841605518352011-03-17T21:30:00.000-07:002011-03-17T21:30:18.442-07:00Signs from the Universe<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzxeYJUi1Ho1KP-cQjf5rRO8FnPSDd-FhWuJDOMhb-Mi90pvFIR4MsOhVQZOjthv2UX8Yx3Sp3bFnupmRS3y07CfvOhASg9DKXdSEzgfOJ7JAxL11nh0aJKyJTEFqwPovTdWelUA/s1600/building+blocks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzxeYJUi1Ho1KP-cQjf5rRO8FnPSDd-FhWuJDOMhb-Mi90pvFIR4MsOhVQZOjthv2UX8Yx3Sp3bFnupmRS3y07CfvOhASg9DKXdSEzgfOJ7JAxL11nh0aJKyJTEFqwPovTdWelUA/s200/building+blocks.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">I truly believe that there are no such things as coincidences and that all things happen as they are suppose to. Although I have a hard time applying this theory to my mothers death, I do usually apply that to most of the events that happen in life. One day I am sure I will be able to see that as it applies to her as well.</span></span></span></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br />
</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Yesterday was an interesting day for me. I reached my 11 year anniversary at my current place of employment and it felt strangely unfulfilling to me. I went into the office and three things happened that pointed my attention to the fact that the universe was pointing me in a direction that I needed to pay some attention to. </span></span></span> </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br />
</span></span></span></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">I reconnected with a acquaintance from about 5 years ago and she spoke with me about putting in a proposal to come to convocation next year. After some discussion, it appears as if it might be doable and this has been something I have been wanting to do for a while. This was very exciting to me and felt like a break in a path that I have been trying to manifest. </span></span></span> </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: x-small;">After that a coworker, who is a hypnotherapist, informed me that she is going part time at her corporate job and has these wonderful things manifest in her hypnotherapy business. So inspiring that someone gets to manifest their work in those ways and make it all happen!</span></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br />
</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">I then got a phone call from an old tarot client, from about 3 years ago or so. She called wanting to reconnect and get a reading done....</span></span></span></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: x-small;">And then while I was waiting for Rob in class, I saw on facebook that the new Circle Magazine is out and I clicked on the link to see the table of contents. I was published again and once again I didn't remember submitting to the magazine.</span></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: x-small;">And with all of these interesting things happening in one day..... it leaves me wondering where I am going and what the universe is trying to tell me. I am listening...... </span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-54390406825589106922011-03-03T22:26:00.000-08:002011-03-03T22:26:57.846-08:00Great community support and write upsI have continued to be very excited and amazed at all the incredible response I am getting post Pcon, including the write ups that are being published. I thought it would be great to list everything that I could find so that it is accessible for anyone (including myself) who might be interested in reading the reactions that are out there. <br />
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<a href="http://doingmagick.blogspot.com/2011/02/roberts-review-of-pantheacon-2011.html">http://doingmagick.blogspot.com/2011/02/roberts-review-of-pantheacon-2011.html</a><br />
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<a href="http://pncminnesota.wordpress.com/2011/03/02/pantheacon-thoughts-walking-your-talk/">http://pncminnesota.wordpress.com/2011/03/02/pantheacon-thoughts-walking-your-talk/</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.thorncoyle.com/musings/?p=984&cpage=1#comment-6279">http://www.thorncoyle.com/musings/?p=984&cpage=1#comment-6279</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.pagandad.com/2011/02/bridging-gap-by-crystal-blanton-review.html">http://www.pagandad.com/2011/02/bridging-gap-by-crystal-blanton-review.html</a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-49434905249718945312011-02-25T22:34:00.001-08:002011-02-25T22:34:42.303-08:00Special Pcon thanks.....There are so many wonderful people I got to meet or spend some measure of time with at Pantheacon. Every year I feel like I meet great people but this year is different because it was around a lot of networking and quality discussions... not just a chance hello or introduction. Of some of the people that I got to meet, I would like to give a shout out to some that really stuck out to me; Peter Dybing, Star Foster, Jason Pitzl-Waters, T. Thorn Coyle, Luisha Teish, Starhawk and other great people. <div> <br></div><div>I also enjoyed my conversations with Don Frew, Anna Korn, Rabbit, Gwen, Jennifer and Amory, Rachel and many others. Thank you everyone for making this such a milestone event in my career and in my healing. Last years Con was full of sadness and walking around in a daze after my mothers memorial a week earlier. This year I was present and have many memories to help sustain me. And I am so lucky to be able to share year after year of Cons with my coven sisters and friends. <br> <div><br> </div></div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-51604666444371062142011-02-23T21:13:00.000-08:002011-02-23T21:13:42.490-08:00Pantheacon Part 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSp1TsYx5nyVyPxeW8SSRrYfimlypMaj5IALBDr9wBPJJNMQdaKE9Ra7PUGlkHDv0c-_K_Fj0zAIAkvgNdTzLNzzMDd0JTwjo-Ab_ruwgVdeN41StuYUUcjv5VleQmK1elCb6DDw/s1600/Pantheacon+2011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSp1TsYx5nyVyPxeW8SSRrYfimlypMaj5IALBDr9wBPJJNMQdaKE9Ra7PUGlkHDv0c-_K_Fj0zAIAkvgNdTzLNzzMDd0JTwjo-Ab_ruwgVdeN41StuYUUcjv5VleQmK1elCb6DDw/s200/Pantheacon+2011.jpg" width="200" /></a> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2Q3S-JrIs4zXTkczaYLqWqDBOUaV4p3zbTzc0AZjAZFlUM5C8tP4g27K3W6HF8JMlECp5FOMrYJ4pfdFk-07DrVBbzTMI2UghzvOxn9TtehPwTl-wNNZf3WGEF1gQAoMpEL2DEQ/s1600/Peter+and+I+pantheacon+2011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2Q3S-JrIs4zXTkczaYLqWqDBOUaV4p3zbTzc0AZjAZFlUM5C8tP4g27K3W6HF8JMlECp5FOMrYJ4pfdFk-07DrVBbzTMI2UghzvOxn9TtehPwTl-wNNZf3WGEF1gQAoMpEL2DEQ/s200/Peter+and+I+pantheacon+2011.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Late night, early morning; up at 7ish to prepare for my 9am. With about 4 hours of sleep, I got up and got dressed in my professional garb. The seminar went well and it generated great discussions about Witch Wars, leadership and sustainability. I enjoyed the seminar and was very pleased by the book sales from the seminar. <br />
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After the seminar I spent time shopping, volunteering time at the charity auction, bidding on items in the auction, a book signing in the vendor room and spending time with my friends and family. Jon decided to stay another night and we spent time hanging out and going to see Pandemoneom perform for a bit. We spent time laughing and hanging out with our friends in the hotel. It was so wonderful to just be able to be present in that space and not worry about the demands of the world around us. <br />
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The next morning I got up early and went to the Pagan Newswire Collective seminar. I am very excited about the opportunity to have media that is Pagan centered and what we might be able to build with those resources at our fingertips. Wonderful things are happening! In addition, I got to meet Star Foster and Jason Pitzl-Waters. Very exciting stuff and incredibly awesome people. I think Jason is a wonderful speaker and very professional in his delivery of information. Star is vibrant, beautiful and fun. I thought she had such great energy and it felt like we were old friends. I look forward to building connections and friendships with both of these great people!<br />
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After the seminar I went for my book signing slot, then ate lunch with Jon and hung out in the hotel room. When it was time to say goodbye to Jon, I had a hard time. We had so much fun together and much needed bonding time. After that I went back to shopping, spending time with friends, and hanging out in the live charity auction. Amber K and Azriel were the auction presenters and Amber K is hilarious!! <br />
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We were quite successful at the auction and Kat is the master bidder! She won a sword, harp and kilt. Talk about a good time!!<br />
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The night ended with a Morrighan ritual done by T. Thorn Coyle and Sharon Knight. Then off to see Haggis Revenge..... that is a whole other blog in and of itself. <br />
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More to come!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-49848539814319793812011-02-23T10:50:00.000-08:002011-02-23T10:51:04.510-08:00Pantheacon part 1<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM-X-wuScFbnE-iWlcTxH_E6KaTcphQf2WgZJWifXxHd8SH40aQo8J2Ya9SbEroUucSeDm4OUHU_9nAkCFQG2lcBMOiQkBwhnLmTG1oUcJF5m1gkY7uOT8ccWVLPUYg_HhkZgEgQ/s1600/Jon+and+I+at+Pcon+2011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="294" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjM-X-wuScFbnE-iWlcTxH_E6KaTcphQf2WgZJWifXxHd8SH40aQo8J2Ya9SbEroUucSeDm4OUHU_9nAkCFQG2lcBMOiQkBwhnLmTG1oUcJF5m1gkY7uOT8ccWVLPUYg_HhkZgEgQ/s320/Jon+and+I+at+Pcon+2011.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>There are so many exciting and fun things from Pantheacon this year that I will probably break it up into several posts so that I have a chance to really process all the moments and things that happened. I had a blast! Let me first start with saying that and that I met some incredible people and got valuable feedback this year on my presentations and book. Although it is always scary to write, present and put yourself out there in the public eye; it is a great experience to know that what I am doing can support others in some small ways. That is the reason that I have always wanted to do this, not because I want the name or recognition (although recognition is nice), it is because I want to be able to support our community in learning what we need to continue to create healthy and productive dynamics with others. I have been that person coming into the Pagan community and was taken advantage of and hurt. I have seen others hurt and have hurt others without realizing the ramifications of my actions. For all of those reasons, I am honored to be able to do this work and write about it for others.<br />
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I arrived at the Con on Friday about 12 and we checked in with little lines and got to our rooms to settle in. After a small hotel room assignment mix up, we were on our way and I was excited to finally be at the event that I look forward to all year long. My first seminar was at the 3:30 time slot and I thought that it would be a small crowd since people are just arriving and some are still working at that time. To my surprise, the room was packed! Thank goodness my husband, friends and other awesome people helped to put out more chairs and support the process. I was so surprised by the amount of people that I became a little flushed and overwhelmed. LOL!<br />
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The workshop (circle restore; Restorative practices in covens and circles) went very well and it seemed that people were interested, engaged and could relate to the issues at hand within the community. This was exciting for me since it was validated to confirm that the lack of conflict resolution methods and training in our community has led to such hurtful situations all around. Everyone participated and I got some great feedback. I sold some books and it felt as if there was a nice buzz around the types of concepts we could extend into our community. <br />
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For the first time, I got to meet Peter Dybing (National First Officer of Covenant of the Goddess) in the workshop. Peter reached out to me a couple of months ago after buying my book and has been such as awesome supporter for me since then. He attended the workshop and was able to give me some constructive feedback to support making it even better. (Thanks Peter!)<br />
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It was wonderful to have my friends and Jon there at the workshop to support me. I felt great about the experience, even though I was so nervous I was sweating. :)<br />
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After the workshop, I got to hang out with everyone, shop in the vendor area, eat dinner with the hubbie and go to the Pomba Gira (I waited all year for this). We dressed up and went dancing for an hour. My husband had such a great experience in the Pomba that I spent a lot of time trying to keep him on this side of the plane instead of being ridden all the way by the Umbanda Gods for the first time. He loved it and I loved seeing him so engaged in the spiritual aspect of himself. Pcon has a way of doing that for people.<br />
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After Pomba, we went to the room, hung out and spent some quality time nursing our feet after almost 2 hours of dancing. I loved every minute of it.<br />
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That was the first day of a wonderful 4 day weekend experience. More to come.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-53924650659377139012011-02-07T21:06:00.000-08:002011-02-07T21:06:56.444-08:00Finding Spirit in the Tough TimesThe last year changed life for me and the family dramatically. The new year has brought a lot of beautiful things along with some sad moments of realization, understanding and facing of mortality once again. While there continues to be a lot of adjustment on the parts of almost everyone in our home, there is still a lot to do in the area of healing and adjusting to all the changes that have happened in our lives over the last year and a half. <br />
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A year ago my mother died and this past week I have gone to the hospital twice to visit my aunt. She was in remission from breast cancer and it has returned. In addition, she is very sick with other issues that are even more pressing than the cancer and the doctors are battling several issues at once. <br />
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I won't go into all the gruesome details of my feelings and the reminders of sitting in the hospital with my mother. Instead I will say that it is a wake up call that the ebb and flow of life's trials are constant and it is not about being able to stay at one place in life for long. Change is the only constant, right?<br />
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I have been working hard at coming back to my spiritual self over the last year and have made great strides in the past several months. Hypnotherapy is one of the things that has really pushed me beyond the limits that I set myself within. Once again I am looking at my aunt and thinking that I must prepare to fall back into the faith that I have been rebuilding. The Gods are guiding me in learning how to love, live and let go. Some of the hardest lessons I have ever had to learn.<br />
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So while I am considering what it means to hope you are not looking at the end of someone you love, I am also putting my faith in overdrive and pushing forward. I know it is important for me to be present in this process with her and although it is a harsh reminder of the memory of my mother dying, it is also a honor to be there and sharing love when I can. <br />
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Finding spirit in the tough times can be one of the biggest and most difficult challenges there are but ones that can also propel us towards understanding things on a whole different level of spiritual connection.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-27910281861490006832011-01-30T21:15:00.000-08:002011-01-30T21:15:06.883-08:00Imbloc BlessingsThis weekend marked the one year anniversary of my mother's tragic death and it was a relatively good weekend. I did not think it would be but I am coming to remember some of the deeply spiritual things that I use to love about this time of year and I am trying to infuse them together with the memories of what I have lost. I have been working a lot with the hypnotherapist around removing blockages and not allowing those old memories to taint the hope that I once carried so firmly. It is working and little by little I am feeling more myself and more able to belief in the power of my own manifestation again.<br />
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So this weekend I celebrated the turning wheel of Imbolc by going to the gym and being present in the needs of my body. Three days in a row at the gym was very uplifting and I feel great! I have stopped smoking and tomorrow will make one week. Thanks to Jenny (the hypnotherapist) planting the seed in my head that it would be a great present to my mother on her death anniversary.... it stuck and took hold. I feel good about it and it is one more thing I am letting go of that is a result of her accident. I started smoking again when she was in the hospital. It was one of the only vices I had to take care of myself while dealing with the horrific situation. <br />
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I spent some time with a witchy friend and reconnected with her over coffee. It was wonderful. I have spent some time taking care of business at home and preparing for Pantheacon. All things I needed to do for one reason or another.<br />
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So, with this turn of the wheel and the creeping energy of the sun peeking through, I chose to enjoy my weekend the best I could and honor the Gods for giving me another year to remember my mother with. I know that if I continue to honor her in her life with me then she will truly live forever; as do the Gods and the ancestors. <br />
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May your Imbolc be blessed and filled with the knowledge that the dark half is ending and the light will once again return.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-17951382919535468382011-01-21T19:48:00.000-08:002011-01-21T19:48:40.651-08:00Welcoming the full moon and a weekend of relaxationSometimes a chain of events will lead to what feels like moments of chaos and unexpected series of events. That is what this week has been for me. With the combination of coping withtje anniversary of my mom's accident, dealing with sick kids, huge decisions and a stressful week at work, I am more than ready for a week of calming energy ti help rejuevinate the soul. While 2011 is going in the right direction to bring closure to the hos of last year, it is weeks like this that serve as reminders of what was almost all of last year. <br />
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I'm the new year I have made it a conscious decision to acknowledge that I am grateful those days are done and hopeful that when periods like this do happen, I know it is just a moment. I have been doing a lot of internal work to recharge the batteries that became so drained from the emotional demands of last year and those are the things I want to continue to be grateful for. Today I feel like I have some direction again and even though it is not all the way clear, I have some ideas as to where I am going. <br />
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Redefining a dream for myself has been one of the biggest challenges I have struggled with, my old dream depended on having my mom here and freedoms I no longer have. With that, it has been hard to see the visual but it is getting a little easier now. <br />
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So this weekend I am focusing on decluttering the last week from my energy, planning next moves and staying in a state of mindful gratefullness so that I cam be in a place for manifestation. And just maybe the full moon will support my weekend journey.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-79739500316230471532011-01-02T23:10:00.001-08:002011-01-02T23:10:25.811-08:00New Years, Second session and Berkano BabesThis has been an overall good weekend. I was able to spend some time at the movies with the hubbie on Friday and going out to lunch since we had daycare. It was nice to get out and be just adults. Friday night (new Years eve) we stayed at home and drank sparkling cider with the kids and my two nephews. Jon, Robbie and I did our little new year prayer for peace and happiness in the new year and then we lit candles. <div> <br></div><div>Saturday morning I got up and went to my second hypnotherapy/NLP session with Jenny Knowles to work on releasing, opening up to new information and finding balance. It was a good session. We did a technique that I have never done before (although I have heard of it) called Emotional Freedom Technique or "tapping". I liked this although it was uncomfortable at times and hard to deal with because part of this was getting into the emotional state that I struggle with and then use this technique to support breaking of patterns. Wow, that was powerful and emotional. A lot of work was done around feeling the helplessness from what has happened in the last year. </div> <div><br></div><div>Amazingly I was able to support my son with using the tapping techniques later that night when he got pretty emotional thinking about my mother. It seemed to help both of us.</div><div><br></div><div> The end of New Years day ended with tarot readings and laughs with my friends in the Berkano Babes group. We ate chinese food, home made cupcakes and did tarot readings for hours.</div><div><br></div><div>Interestingly I got a very clear message in both of the events throughout the day (hypnotherapy/NLP and tarot) was that I need to allow myself to be in the moment and not worry about fixing things in the future. Using resources that I have right now is important and more productive than the pressure of finding solutions to all that is happening. So I am taking this into the new year and working on being in today.</div> <div><br></div><div>I am entering the new year with some hope and openness of what is to come. </div><div><br></div><div>P.S. I would like to give an honest referral to those who might be looking for a way to change old patterns, support new and positive thoughts and open the way to manifestation and goals. Jenny Knowles is the hypnotherapist that I have been seeing and she is very good. I recommend her with high enthusiasum. She is honest, open, empathetic and has a great gift for supporting the discovery of what the client wants and needs instead of inserting what her goals might be. Her website is <a href="http://effectivehealinghypnosis.com/">http://effectivehealinghypnosis.com/</a>. </div> <div><br></div><div>Happy New year everyone.</div><div>Blessed Be<br clear="all"><br><br><br> </div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-65857105935758952792010-12-27T00:20:00.001-08:002010-12-27T00:20:28.782-08:00Hypnotherapy, new hope and standing with my mother againI went today to get my first session of hypnosis and NLP (neuro linguistic programming) after much consideration and thought. I have looked into hypnotherapy a couple of times, starting about two years ago. What better time to do it than when things are at the most overwhelming and I have had so many things that I am working to overcome within the last year of chaos and upset. <div> <br></div><div>I didn't know what to expect and was a little skeptical but I have trust with the person that I was going to and know that she also knows my situation. I have a level of trust with her that she would not use me to do something that was not effective, just to make some money. She wouldn't use me that way.</div> <div><br></div><div>So I went to her office, went through the motions of idenitfying some of the things I am dealing with and talking about some of the dreams that I have feel have been stifled by the current chain of events that have been 2010. I sat in her special chair, allowed her to take me into trance and work some magic. Magic is what it truly is and I had several experiences that I still cannot describe or wrap my head around yet. I know that I had several interesting experiences, one of which connected me to my mother and felt very rewarding. One of the many times she "dunked" me under, I went to my place of healing and it is this very comfortable place where I was sitting on a white bench on green grass with flowers all around. There were no buildings or additional distractions, just greenery, flowers and lots of open blue sky. I went to this place in one of my times of going under but it was the next time that was really significant.</div> <div><br></div><div>When I went under the next time and she took me to this place, she asked me to describe my healing place and I did. She asked me if there were any animals and of course there was not. She then asked me if there were any trees and I remember telling her "there were not until you asked me that". When she asked me, a tall and beautiful redwood tree sprang up by my bench and brought me to tears while under hypnosis. For those who do not know, my mother loved redwood trees. The first time we went to the redwoods together at Muir Woods, she feel in love with the beauty and serenity of the redwood forests. It was something we shared together.</div> <div><br></div><div>We went together again and she bought things to remind her of the trees including incense, oils and even bookmarks. The redwoods represent her to me so when the tree came up, there was no doubt to me that it was her in my healing place. On the next time under hypnosis, she was there again and when it was time for me to listen for her messages, a thick fog came over me and I was not able to see the healing place clearly. The fog would come and go, giving me small glimpses of my special place, and giving me a clear message that I have been living in a fog that has blocked me from seeing what I need to see. The hypnotherapist told me afterwards that most people don't know they are walking in a fog, so this was progress for me to see exactly what is happening in my life and bringing it to my conscious mind.</div> <div><br></div><div>I walked out of this session feeling strangely lighter and clearer than I have in a long while. Although I don't know all the ways that this will begin to effect my life, I know that it was one of the best things I could have done to give me a chance to clear the path for growth, clear the fog I have been living in, bring me closer to healing and to my mother and start again with manifesting my desires. </div> <div><br></div><div>I am very excited to go to the next session and continue on this new found path. I don't know all the places that it will lead but I know it is going to help bring me back to me and to who I want to be. Thank you to my new hypnotherapist for knowing that I had secrets to unlock that will lead me back to success and for making it possible in many ways. </div> <div><br></div><div>I will keep everyone posted on these developments as they unfold and as I grow closer to beauty.</div><div>Blessed Be</div><div><br> </div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-32991233306196630352010-12-25T21:56:00.001-08:002010-12-25T21:56:54.595-08:00New Years Resolutions and the likesI am not a huge around the thought of new years resolutions and wanting to be something different at the beginning of the year. I have the usual thought that people use that one point in the year to be different than they are instead of working all year at making necessary changes. This year I have the same beliefs and do not feel that I need the new year in order to make some decisions about myself. Instead I would like to enter the new year of 2011 with a clean slate, leaving behind some of the things from 2010 that it is time to release and move beyond. <div> <br></div><div>Often people carry around the baggage that accumulates from events and carry them around everyday, weighing them down and tiring them out. This is something we talk about in rehab counseling all the time, finding a way to identify old baggage and then giving yourself permission to let it go. This is something I am very familiar with, not just from saying it to others but from living this in my personal life. I have always had the type of personality that thinks about things until I have processed it and then am able to start the process of release. This is not a pattern that I developed this year, but one that I have had for as long as I can remember. <br> </div><div><br></div><div>So moving into 2011 is very important to me because it is another step towards the releasing of multiple layers of grief throughout the year and making a decision to not take it with me. That is very scary because it means that I am stepping into another unknown layer of my life. I know that the multiple stages of grief are not done and that is not something that can be controlled in that way but it does mean that I starting fresh knowing that the last year is taking me towards something I might not understand but a knowing that something is coming. By releasing I am opening myself to new experiences, new people and new opportunities to love and find love in the world.</div> <div><br></div><div>As with Iyanla Vanzant's book In the Meantime, not all things or all people are meant to last in your life. These things are but stepping stones to different levels of living, whether the experience is good or bad. "<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px; ">When you are not happy where you are, and you are not quite sure if you want to leave or how to leave, you are in the meantime. Its a state of limbo. You are hanging on, ready to let go, afraid to fall, not wanting to hurt yourself, afraid you will hurt someone else. In the meantime, you pray the other person will let go first so that you will not feel guilty." - Iyalna Vanzant - In the Meantime.</span></div> <div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px; "><br></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px; ">I think that quote says it all. I know what my mom would want from me. She would want me to stay solid in who I am and in being proud of that. She would want me to be the best mother I can possibly be. She would tell me to love myself and say fuck it to those who are not with me. She would tell me to focus on being happy and whole, not allowing life or anyone to get me down. </span></div> <div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px; "><br></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 22px; ">So it is not a new years resolution, something I start on a day and then don't follow through with, like so many others. It is a reminder that the next phase has begun and the rest is now the past.... one of purpose and lessons but one that is now gone away. </span></div> <div><br></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, 'Bitstream Vera Sans', sans-serif; font-size: 14px; color: rgb(102, 102, 102); line-height: 22px; "></span> </div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-45318147489347656132010-12-22T23:41:00.000-08:002010-12-22T23:41:26.291-08:00Crazy year coming to a closeI am excited for the end of 2009. I look back at this year and see total overhaul from the previous year and all the goals I set for myself were suddenly changed. While most of my goals last year revolved around completing my book and finding success in that accomplishment, at the end of 2010 most of my goals revolve around finding some level of peace and serenity. The addition of two children and the loss of my mom has changed life as I know it and the family is finding ways to settle into the new course we have been set on.<br />
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I never considered life without my mom, it was the unimaginable task and yet today I find I am living it. Although it doesn't feel real at times, I know that I am going through the stages of loss and contemplating who I am without her now. I remember saying to one of my therapist friends at work that I wanted to go back to being who I use to be and he told me something that was told to him by a therapist when he was dealing with grief. He told me that I was not that person anymore because that person had a mother. I know what that means today.<br />
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So, I have survived one of the most rewarding and horrific years of my life. I have written, completed and saw my book be published; a dream I have had for a long time. And I have also suffered a loss that was so heartbreaking and traumatizing for everyone in my family. As I move into 2011 I am working hard to hold on to all those things I love about this year and allow the universe to cleanse the rest. I hold on hard to the memory of my mother as well, the good ones, the ones she would want me to remember and not the images that I saw from the last two weeks of her life.<br />
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Maybe if I can do this then I can pull the rest of the family along to a place of healing that continues into 2011. That is the plan and the goal. <br />
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As the growing light of the sun creeps into longer days, it is the reminder that darkness and light exist because of each other. One does not exist without the other. So I will use the darkness to shed light on how grateful I am for the many blessings that I have and for the ones that have not come yet. <br />
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Blessed Yule, Solstice and New Years to everyone. May your dark times shed a beautiful light that illuminates everything that is wonderful in the world.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-5535148532704093352010-11-25T09:59:00.001-08:002010-11-25T09:59:38.225-08:00Thanksgiving and trying to be thankfulToday's Thanksgiving and this is a huge day for the family. We have not yet figured out how this is going to work for us but we know that today would've been the day that we celebrated with my mom and the whole family, like we had every other year.<br clear="all"> <br><div>John and I have been working on trying to figure out recipes for Thanksgiving dinner, since my mom was the one who usually did the turkey and the dressing and the greens. Although the mood is a little sad, we are actually doing okay. I know that today my mom is with us and she would want us to have fun.</div> <div><br></div><div>Today I am choosing to be thankful, to celebrate those things and traditions that we have is a family, and gaining excitement for some of the new traditions we have yet to create.</div><div><br></div><div> Here's to wishing everybody a joyous Thanksgiving day. May you be blessed on the day with creating new memories with your family and celebrating those from the old.</div><div><br></div><div>Blessed be.<br><br><br> </div> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8372668.post-43806210243252144012010-11-06T15:21:00.001-07:002010-11-06T15:21:01.985-07:00Third Annual People of the Earth Gathering<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 16px; "><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> Saturday, November 20, 2010</p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> 10:00 am to 4:00 pm</p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> Interfaith Center of the Presidio</p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; "> </p><p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">A gathering of peoples who practice Neopagan traditions, Afro-diasporic traditions, immigrant Pagan traditions, and Indigenous spiritual traditions from the Americas and around the world.</p> <p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">Keynote speaker <strong>Alejandrino Quispe Mejia </strong>is a native Quechua living in Peru. He is Director of the Global Indigenous Initiative, an association of 14 tribes in Latin America working together to preserve native traditions. In addition to being a wonderful opportunity for building relationships between all the Earth religions, the event will include a sharing of practices used in the many traditions to bless a space.</p> <p style="font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; text-align: left; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; line-height: 1.5em; ">Lunch provided, $10-20 donation requested to cover costs. Co-sponsored by the Interfaith Center of the Presidio, the Lost & Endangered Religions Project, the Spirituality & the Earth CC of the United Religions Initiative, and the Northern California Local Council of the Covenant of the Goddess. For more information & to register, contact Don at <a href="mailto:earthreligions@ancientways.com">earthreligions@ancientways.com</a> or (510) 524-2078.</p> </span> Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0